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The Last Resort (2009)

Updated: Aug 19, 2023

My quick rating - 3,1/10. I believe I tried watching this before and the subtitles were cut off, and they are again. I am going to just watch it and see since it doesn't appear to be anything worth keeping anyways. The beginning is meant to setup the evil that is at this resort, but it was shot to look like a home camera recording the footage which threw me off. It is meant to be that way, just FYI. A group of woman, none of which can act their way out of a shoebox, head to a Mexican resort for a bachelorette weekend and most of them are immediately abducted and left for dead in the middle of nowhere. Apparently the shack the find to hole up in for the night is where the initial scene took place since they all start acting like aggressive bitches towards each other in a frankly amusing way. The lead up with the girlies and their little adventures takes up entirely too long in a film that is only 75 minutes. So more than half of that is just them being drunken women and being abducted. The actual horror element that you are briefly introduced to doesn't come in for so long that most people will have shut this one off before ever getting to any scares. Not really saying there are many of those either. Those elements finally show up in the rescue attempt which almost plays out as comic relief but the writers are playing it dead serious. The whole thing is just a lost cause since it is written so poorly that I just didn't care about anything that happened. I doubt the cut off text would've made a lick of difference. The poster is by far the highlight of this whole thing.

A couple of streamers including Amazon have this one. I wonder if their subtitles are broken as well.

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