Kill Her Goats (2023)

My quick rating - 2.3/10. I have had this flick for quite some time, just taking up space. Well, Bec did a blind pick of this one, so we'll see how it is. I did notice that Kane Hodder is in this one, so I'll assume he takes the killer role. I don't believe I have ever seen a slasher flick that has gone so far out of its way to cover up the women's boobs so blatantly. At least 2 of the 3 main chicks here were very clear about not showing those nipples, that is for sure. And after you get to hear them attempting to act, you immediately know what they were hired for, and it wasn't for their thespian skills. What we have are 2 women who are invited to Audra's (Arielle Raycene) new graduation gift, which happens to be a house, LOL. At the start, we are introduced to some backstory of this dream house that she is given, which leads to the homeowners vanishing and the home possibly being haunted. So the three chicks who have a strange problem with being able to keep their clothes on are soon in peril as some unwanted guests arrive. Some of which are goats just roaming around for no reason. We got the gist of the slasher trope right away in the opening scene, so you'll be pretty much prepared for what you are getting here. Except that some of the key elements are missing. We do not get anything in creative kills whatsoever. The gore is very minimal for the amount of blood they show afterward, and as I pointed out while watching, only one of the actors showed her tits, while the others didn't. Not that this is necessary, but the lengths they went to hide it were really bizarre. When you are attempting to get points from T&A, where the camera shots were pretty clear they were, you may want to at least throw a little plot at us to connect the scenes together. Then, toward the end, it just felt like the director (Steve Wolsh) just looked at the cast and said, "Wing it from here," since he completely lost control of what was going on. I also thought I recognized his name, and lo and behold, I found my comments on his only other movie Muck. What I said about him seems to stand up: "Simple, 2 points for 2 boobs. The director is obviously obsessed with them," so apparently, things haven't changed since his 2015 venture. The last 15 minutes are a mess, while the first 40 minutes are a bore, and you need to suffer through some of the worst dialogue ever put down on paper. I only suggest it is written since there are outtakes showing them messing up lines at the end. That took my joke out of the conversation, being improvised away after I tormented myself with the flick. Do yourself a favor and don't do the same.

A few streamers have this one for cheap which still may be too expensive LOL.

Kill Her Goats (2023)

#horror #turkey #jackmeatsflix #IMDB #Plex